In Defense of Friendship

Several years ago my front door became a revolving portal through which therapists, early intervention specialists, kids for playgroups, and sometimes stray animals entered. Despite the chaos, I felt overwhelmingly isolated. So it was with irony that I decided I was too busy for friendships. I went on my “mom on a mission” life and thought I was tough enough to make it on my own.

It wasn’t really until the biggest storm blew over that I finally realized the importance of friends – which seems backwards, doesn’t it? Well it is. I wish I had come to this eureka moment much sooner. It isn’t until we make our friends a priority, that we receive the serendipitous rewards of friendship. We must squeeze in time whether it's between soccer practice, homework, science fairs, and work. If we don't, we're missing out on an important piece of life.

So I’m dedicating this blog entry to all the friends who have lifted me in hard times, cheered me on when failure was imminent, and told me to remember my own motto.

To you!

Here’s to the friend(s) who:

• came to my door holding “made from scratch” cupcakes in one hand and her three-year old in the other. For the entire conversation I forgot that I was a week overdue with Bobby Banjo. I even got so carried away they slid off the plate, yes all 10 of them, homemade frosting side down on the carpet.

• brought me flowers, unknowingly, right after my four-year old told me he hated me for the very first time and slammed the door in my face.

• said to me, “I’ll take dorky over fluffy” any day, referring to me as the dork.

• is a make up artist and volunteered to do my make up for my author photo. She also had done Stephenie Meyer, Glenn Beck, and other celebs which made me feel even more special to be grazed by her foundation brush.

• brought dinner over the day Sean passed out in the bathroom at work.

• drove to SLC to my book signing in the snow with her car full of girlfriends, and arranged for us to all have dinner beforehand.

• drove miles to come to my Malad library event – many of whom I haven’t seen since high school.

• saw I needed girl time and arranged to go mountain biking with me.

• brought dinner over when I had strep throat for the seventh time that year.

• read my book and sent me touching emails. There are many of you all across the country.

• didn't get upset with me for dominating the conversation because she kept asking me so many questions.

• reassured me that I can still make it to heaven even if I've said a few bad words.

• didn't freak out when I dented her car.

• told me my zipper really wasn't down when I gave that presentation even though it really was.

• arranged to have lunch last week. Judd had a fever that day, but I took him with me anyway. As I opened the door of the restaurant, her son was throwing up in the corner. We ended up chatting and crying in the car in her driveway.

• blogging friends who have better lift and support than a 44D.

• took photos at my book signing, enlarged one to a 5x7, framed it and delivered shortly after. Also included in the package was a necklace imprinted with the year 2009 and on the flipside says, “Never, never give up.”

• reciprocates but doesn't smother.

• watched Bobby Banjo so that I could pitch my tent at the capitol for 45 days.

• acted as my personal publicists.

• know the importance of women supporting each other.

• laughed and sometimes snorted even when I wasn't that funny.

• reassured me my that it isn't likely any of my kids will be in prison someday.

• (aka autism moms) who inspire me to be better, every single day.

• taught me how to be a good friend.

Aging is inevitable, but friendship keeps us living.